My Experience as a Solo Female Traveler for the First Time

Motion is the theme for the month of October on catiemenke.com, and it just so happens to be one of my favorite things. As a woman who loves to dance to every beat I hear, gaze in wonder as clouds fly by, and travel the world as often and as far as I can, the word motion means a lot to me. I get the passion for travel and culture from my mom and her parents. It is in my blood. I have an insatiable curiosity to explore, and it’s what I save my money to do. I feel a bit guilty writing this during a world pandemic where travel is on hold, but I am crossing my fingers that it brings you something to look forward to, or sparks a curiosity in you. I believe you can all travel, and should if you have the desire. So I’m here to share a small piece of my story. Today, it starts with my first time being a solo female traveler.

Art Direction and Photograph by: Catie Menke. Model: Jenna Thu.

In January 2017, I set the goal to go on a 2 week international trip alone, to challenge myself in a way I hadn’t before. I have traveled a lot in groups and with friends, but I had never been on my own for an entire trip. I wouldn’t call myself naturally confident, but I have worked hard to build that trait. When choosing a location, I wanted to go somewhere Spanish-speaking because I speak/teach Spanish and saw a good opportunity to work on my language skills and to get around easier. I also wanted to do a homestay with a family so I could experience the authentic, day-to-day life. I had done homestays in Mexico and Spain while in college and LOVED it. It would of course be a little different staying with a family as an adult 32 year old, but hey, I’m an extrovert and I knew it would give me people to interact with.

I have already been to many big cities and beautiful beaches around the world, so I chose to do something completely different and stay in a mountainous rainforest in the lush town of Monteverde, Costa Rica! I had never been to CR, and I love animals and nature. However, I am not fond of big bugs, and I knew there would be BIG bugs! I figured the pros outweighed the cons and went for it. My dad was not happy about my news of wanting to travel alone. He asked many times if my mom could join me, or one of my brothers, and I stood my ground and said that sounds nice, but it does not align well with solo travel. I was engaged at the time and planning to be married in November. My fiance was supportive, as he knew that is really the only choice with me. If my mind is set, I will do what I need to do to accomplish my goal.

At the hotel there was a young man that took me to my room through the rain (an outdoor entrance), and it was the first time I really felt nervous. It was after midnight, dark, storming, and not to mention this guy had keys to every room. I was so anxious that I put my big suitcase in front of the door as a deterrent. I went to sleep, and I told myself not to be afraid just like I always do whenever I’m scared. In the morning there were maybe 6 others on our small bus, and solo me ended up in the passenger seat next to the driver. The ride was not for the faint of heart and I had a front row view, OH MY! I read that many people get sick on the curvy, bumpy, tiny mountain roads, but luckily I didn’t. He drove me down a dirt road with a few houses on it and dropped me off. I was surrounded by a big, beautiful forest and a small, cute orange house planted right in front of me.

I had been sent my homestay information a few days before my arrival, and the household was a single mom with a 10 year old son, her sister, and a dog named Mickey. So, I was expecting a female to open the door. I knocked, and a male around my own age opened the door. I can’t even lie, my bus drove off and I panicked a little. I asked if this was Maureen’s house and he said “Yes, she is at work. Please come in, I made you lunch.” In Spanish, of course. So I went in and sat down to eat. He was very nervous and so was I. He explained that he was her boyfriend and she would be home in a few hours. He had never greeted one of her guests before but he showed me to the room I was renting and I began unpacking. It was a 3 bedroom, 1 bathroom house with a small living room/kitchen-- a perfect place to stay. Maureen arrived and was so warm and inviting that I instantly knew I was in the right home. She walked me around the area of the small town so I could get ideas of things to do and places to go. The first morning I woke up to a ton of chatter and noise right outside of the kitchen windows. To my surprise, it was howler monkeys swinging and socializing from the trees. Simply amazing.

For fun I had enrolled independently in a few classes at a language school in town in hopes of learning more about the culture and meeting other travelers to go on adventures with. The schedule was a language course, a cooking course and a dancing course Monday through Thursday. Funny story: I ended up in language classes alone because of my high language level, but I still went exploring regardless of not meeting classmates. I went to a coffee plantation, soccer games with my host family, restaurants, zip lining, to markets and much more. The only thing I didn’t do completely alone was hike in the rainforest. I met another female solo traveler, and we ended up meeting to do several hikes together, so we got to experience the wonders of the rainforest safely. Shout out to other female solo travelers!

I also took a 3-day weekend trip to the most jaw-dropping volcano named Arenal. I booked a nice hotel room there and did a guided lava summit hike, along with a hot spring bath tour. After the weekend away, I returned back to Monteverde to stay the final week with my host family. The 10 year old named Aaron and I got along very well, and would play for hours. I’d watch the nightly news with the family, eat a tasty family meal prepared by my host mom, and we’d chat about life. My homestay included breakfast and dinner daily, as well as my laundry being washed once a week. I LOVE this part of homestays. I mean to say, I love the provided, delicious, authentic meals, not my thong underwear hanging on clotheslines on the patio! It truly is the best way to experience the culture. You get used to being a part of the household, and it is so special to be invited into another person’s home. Much love to my phenomenal hosts. My last weekend there, I traveled to the coast to take a catamaran to Tortuga Island for some beach time. On the boat I met 4 girls, and 2 of them were solo, so we hung out all day. We snorkeled, sun bathed, and listened to live salsa music. It was magical.

Art Direction and Photograph by: Catie Menke. Model: Heidi Zielinski. — Art Direction and Photograph by: Catie Menke. Model: Jenna Thu.

I returned home after 16 days and felt a sense of calm, pride, and accomplishment at the life changing trip I had experienced in beautiful Costa Rica. There are a million other stories I could share about my trip and other trips, but this is just an excerpt. Of course, it did feel great to be in my now-husband’s arms again and cuddle my sweet dog Beau. Were there times where I was uncertain, lost and scared? Absolutely. But those times are completely overwritten by the unbelievable adventures, gorgeous scenery, and unforgettable people I met along the way. The majority of people in the world are good, and I choose to trust in my intuition everyday. This quote by Cheryl Strayed fits my adventure well: “Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves, and so I chose to tell myself a different story from the one women are told. I decided I was safe, I was strong, and I was brave.”

Were you scared? Sometimes. How did you figure all this out? I used Google to research and plan my trip. Was it expensive? No, in terms of a two week trip, it was cheaper than many options even if staying in the USA. Did you like being alone? Yes, I love that I can do and experience things as I wish on my own.

On Instagram in the search type # and the place you are going like #CostaRica and follow it for all sorts of photos/posts about the places you are interested in visiting.